Friday, November 5, 2010

Autumn in the Midwest



The autumn leaves. . .

Waltz across tawny lawns
In golden gowns,
Swaying, swirling
to the symphony of the wind.


Tumble across
The mat of asphalt streets
Like acrobats,
Colliding in exhausted heaps
Of red and orange.


Play tag among passing cars
Like naughty children;
Auburn hair in tangles,
Whispering secrets as they scatter.

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Happy, Happy, Happy

Recently a college friend whom I see only occasionally told me that I looked young, beautiful and happy!

Now, it was nice to be regarded as young and beautiful, especially when the reflection in the mirror reveals a sixty-year-old face with lines around the mouth, a slackness in the jaw, and dark circles under the eyes. The image is definitely not air-brushed!

But when I heard the word HAPPY, my heart leaped because that is a transformational gift from God! Through biblically based counseling at Living Foundation Ministries, God renewed my mind (Romans 12:2) and healed my broken heart (Isaiah 61:1) as He unraveled the tangled threads of depression and perfectionistic thinking embedded so deeply within me. Recovery demanded a lot of tears and a lot of prayers, but over time, I began to notice a deep joy bubbling within.

What joy
to be free of false guilt
to be free of unhealthy shame
to walk in the grace of God
to laugh at myself
to be authentic
to enjoy people with all their quirks and foibles
to love them with abandon
to experience God's faithfulness and redemption

Life is not perfect; I am not perfect! When pounded by busyness, grief, or fatigue, this spring seems to slow to a trickle. But, in truth, life's stresses and burdens will never squelch this bubbling joy, for it is the Living Water (John 7:38) Jesus Christ who said, "Whoever drinks of the water that I shall give him shall never thirst, but the water . . . shall be in him a well of water springing up into everlasting life." (John 4:14).

He is the same yesterday, today, and forever. (Hebrews 13:8)



Saturday, January 9, 2010

Daddy

My dad passed November 29 after a brief illness. My oldest son Jeff and I collaborated on writing his eulogy, and Jeff delivered it. I will miss him for the rest of my life, and I share it here to honor a wonderful man.

Walter Hugh Young was born February 1, 1925, to Dr. Edward Lee Young, Sr., and Alma Johnson Young at the family’s home on South 5th Street in Grandview. His older brother Edward, Jr., was four at the time. Dr. Young had a successful veterinary practice and was the first mayor of Grandview and Alma, who worked hard maintaining the home, was involved in garden clubs and church functions. In his memoirs, Uncle Edward described the four of them as a “happy, loving family.”

Someone told Grandpa’s dad that when a person’s initials spell a word, that person will become a millionaire. Though not a superstitious man, his dad still chose his son’s name, so the initials spelled a word – Why? No, that is what the initials spelled - WHY. Grandpa loved to tell this story and always pointed out that, at least in his case, the idea didn’t work! Grandpa didn’t much like the name Walter and was glad the family chose to call him Hugh.

On March 1, 1933, the family moved from the house on 5th Street to a farm they owned on 150 Highway. Uncle Edward has noted this was when “A great adventure began.” The boys had lots of chores at the farm. They made butter from the fresh cow’s milk, dried the dishes, kept the basement coal and wood bins stocked, snapped green beans, hulled peas, milked cows, watered livestock, etc., but there was still plenty of time for fun!

A favorite play spot was the pond. Grandpa, Edward and their cousins John and Claude Makin made little boats from scrap wood and keels from empty Prince Albert tobacco cans. They added a square sail and let the wind blow the boats across the pond. When John and Edward were about fourteen, their parents permitted them to carry .22 caliber rifles and shotguns. The boys redesigned the boats by boring a hole in the cockpit, so it would accommodate a small burning candle. Then using their father's empty, discarded medicine bottles filled with gasoline, they sailed the boats across the pond, shooting at the bottle with the rifles. When a bottle broke from the shot, the candle flame would ignite the gasoline, and with the sense of accomplishment boys can enjoy, they would watch the boats burn to the water line.

When a former neighbor’s husband died, she gave the boys (with their parents’ permission) his .22 caliber rifle. For two or so years after, Grandpa would walk the farm plinking at selected targets, becoming an expert marksman. Edward would even throw small, discarded vaccine glass bottles into the air 30 or 40 feet, and Hugh would break these every time. For such amazing accuracy, Edward nicknamed him "Dead-Eye Dick."

One summer a man who operated pony-riding rings boarded 10 ponies at the Young farm. He told Dr. Young that it would be fine if his sons wanted to ride them. So, they did. The boys rode bareback and tied clotheslines around the ponies’ lower jaws to guide them. Most of the time, Uncle Edward says they just rode them as fast as they could. But they didn’t just ride them.

They got some croquet mallets and wooden balls and had polo games. After the sunflowers matured in late summer, they cut the stalks and used them for lances and jousted like knights of old, trying to knock each other off the ponies.

During his school years, Grandpa was a member Grandview United Methodist Church and 4-H. At school, he participated in basketball and baseball and served as president of Grandview High School’s student council. The teachers provided Hugh with an excellent education. He was interested in history and literature and had a knack for writing and memorization. Through the years, he often quoted passages from the classics that he had read and studied. Grandma says Grandpa was a favorite of Mrs. Suddath, his English teacher.

Grandpa had many childhood friends, in addition to his brother and cousins. One of them was Lee Soxman, Jr. who is with us today, another Roy Kilby. Grandpa’s mother tucked several Valentines cards in his baby book, and most of them are from Roy through the elementary school years. Kathy remembers one evening her parents answered a knock on the door, and there stood Roy and Minnie Skeens Kilby dropping by for an unannounced visit. From that day on, the Youngs and Kilbys went out to dinner and played pinochle every Saturday night until Roy died in 1974. The two of them ventured into the automatic car wash business in the 1960s. Somehow they managed to turn one hour’s work of cleaning out the stalls, emptying the coin machines, and restocking supplies into two or three! Grandma and Minnie suggested the two alternate turns. That worked for awhile, but Roy and Grandpa had too much fun together to keep to that schedule.

One day during Grandpa’s senior year in high school, he was sitting in home room when a new student – a cute, petite, saucy brunette -- walked into the room and his life. He turned to Minnie and said, “That’s the girl I’m going to marry!”

But those thoughts of marriage were soon put on hold. About a month after graduating, at the age of 18, that Grandpa received his draft notice. He was so excited, so ready to defend his country, that he ran into the retaining wall by the basement door as he entered the house and bruised his face!

He served in the Army’s 422nd Infantry, 106th Division. Stationed in Belgium and France, his unit saw action in the Battle of the Bulge. Grandpa didn’t like to talk much about his war experiences, but finally, in 2000, he did write his war memoirs because he thought it important to preserve this personal bit of history for future progeny. He received a Bronze Star for his service and was proud to have helped stop the spread of Nazism.

Still, I remember asking him about how he and his fellow American soldiers had been labeled as this country’s Greatest Generation. I questioned if he thought that was an accurate description as I took some issue with that. Somewhat surprised, I found Grandpa agreed with me. He always commented that the greatest generation consisted of the men who founded this country, for many of them gave their fortunes, their property, and their lives to establish the United States. Grandpa had great respect for them and a great pride in America.

Two and a half years after being drafted, and seven months after being discharged from the Army, that saucy brunette from high school, Dixie Jean Fizer and Hugh were indeed married by a justice of the peace on June 16th in Olathe, KS. In their playful fashion, they disagreed about why one married the other. Grandpa claims his declaration to Minnie. Grandma claims, “I always told him, ‘I picked you to be the father of my children.’”

Grandpa went to work for McGlone Road Construction. So, he and Grandma purchased a trailer, and for the next several years, the family lived in Nebraska and various places in Missouri. During that time, they had two daughters Kathy Jean born in 1950 and Judith Ann born in 1952. When Kathy neared school age, the family returned to Grandview, so she and Judy would not have to change school districts as they grew. At first, the family parked the trailer west of the Young farm house. Later, they built a home east of the house, and in the early 70s when the state claimed eminent domain to widen 150, Grandpa and Uncle Edward built homes farther off the road. Grandma and Grandpa lived there for 30 years before recently moving to a smaller home still here in Grandview.

After leaving the McGlone Construction, Grandpa went to work for Hydro Butane Gas and later worked for Dusselier Brothers Concrete, then retired from RED Concrete in 1990. Grandpa LOVED retirement. The extra time gave him new hours to devote to his passions: traveling, fishing, and hunting.

When Kathy and Judy were children, they visited Grandma’s sister and family in the St. Louis area, but in later years, Grandpa and Grandma vacationed in much of the United States, focusing on sites that were connected to American history. Grandpa’s favorite seemed to be the “Big Sky” country of Montana. When their daughters were grown, Grandpa and Grandma continued to travel, making almost yearly fishing trips to Canada.

The best trip of all, however, had to be to Europe. Instead of a 50th wedding anniversary party, Grandma and Grandpa invited Kathy and Judy to join them as they visited most of the places Grandpa had been stationed in WWII. It was the trip of a life time and a special time for the four of them.

A member of Missouri Conservation, Hugh enjoyed raising and training pointers and loved hunting with these dogs. His daughters can not remember a time their dad did not own a pointer – usually more than one. We have pictures of two-year-old Judy posing the pet Brittany as she had seen her daddy do during field trial dog shows. From the time they were toddlers, the family dined on dove, squirrel and rabbit – although Kathy worried that might have been Thumper – and quail, oh yes, lots of quail.

Quail is considered a delicacy in many five-star restaurants, and my dad looked forward to his first quail dinner after hearing the others rave. He was stunned when he saw how small the pieces were and how many he had to eat before he was full!

When the family built their home in 1970, the dogs were not left out, being housed in their very own brick building! Grandma said if she was going to look out the kitchen window at dog pens, she wanted it to be an attractive view! The walls of the living room are covered with photographs of dogs on point in the field: Pokey, Belle, Sue, Sweetie, Rip, and Tyrell -- just to name a few. Grandpa’s last pointer was Scout, who, when he no longer hunted, became the family’s 6th grandchild. To be sure, Scout didn’t stay in that nice brick dog pen; she made it to the house! When my grandparents dined out and asked for a doggie bag – it was literally food for the dog!

Through the years, Grandma and Grandpa were blessed with five grandchildren: Pat, Beth, Kristin, Sara, and myself. They were and are the delight of their lives. He survived his first great-grandson, Brock but is survived by three great-granddaughters: Kara, Anna, and Lydia, visits with whom he very much enjoyed.

Suffering through the onset of Alzheimer’s didn’t rob Grandpa of the joy he had in life. His doctor mentioned that it was unusual for someone to keep his sense of humor like he did. That is just one of the many things those of us who knew and loved him best will remember about him – a fun-loving, caring, gracious, gentle, generous, hard-working man who was a faithful husband of 63 years, a good father, a kind-hearted grandpa, and a proud great-grandpa.

Thank you all for sharing in his memories with us today as we celebrate a life that will be greatly missed, but a life we all hope we may one day see again in the glories of Heaven.

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Satisfaction

What satisfies me?
  • Celebrating special occasions and holidays with family
  • Reading a good novel: one that pulls me into the setting and lives of its characters, one that leaves me thinking about that place and those people for days afterward
  • Viewing the night sky through my telescope
  • Smelling spring in the April air after March's cold and blustery rain
  • Lingering over lunch with good friends
  • Presenting someone I love with the perfect gift
  • Enjoying dinner and a movie with my dear husband
  • Playing with my granddaughters
  • Finding bargains when I shop
  • Sorting clutter and getting organized
  • Spending Sunday morning worshipping God through music and study

This week in Bible Study Fellowship we covered John 4, where in Verse 34, Jesus tells His disciples, "My nourishment comes from doing the will of God who sent me and from finishing His work." (the Living Bible)

This question was presented: What should a Christian who does not have "heart" satisfaction do to find the same meaning in life? At first, I listed

  • Spend time alone with God
  • Meditate on His Word
  • Surrender to the Holy Spirit
  • Pray for the Him to infill and guide
  • Confess sin immediately
  • Share Jesus with others

Then I stopped to re-read a referenced verse in Acts 20:24, where Paul says, ". . . neither do I count my life dear unto myself, so that I might finish my course with joy, and the ministry, which I have received of the Lord Jesus to testify the gospel of the grace of God." (King James)

To allow God to order my time in service to Him, to rest and abide in the confidence that He can take care of my life's details while placing me just where He needs me at any given moment, to place His kingdom work at the top of my to-do list, to pray for the grace to share Jesus with any needy soul, to let go and let God -- herein lies true "heart" satisfaction.

Monday, October 26, 2009

Well-Wishers

This was posted at my former blog "marmee's musings in April, 2006. Today my Bible study included John 4 and reminded me of this post. It appears here for the first time.

I have a definite image of what a well should look like: a stone and mortar structure, topped with a rack-shambled roof and a sturdy, cranking handle to lower and raise the bucket that dangles from a rope. The kind that might be depicted in a children's book with old-fashioned illustrations. The kind you throw a penny in and make a wish.

My grandma had an abandoned well on her farm, which had always been covered by only a concrete slab. Equipped with an electric pump, it had once provided water for the house -- no penny wishes, no dipping bucket. It was a point of interest because my mother continuously warned my sister and me not to remove the cover. I marveled that she thought her four-year-old had such brute strength!

Today my interest in wells turns to the Bible, especially regarding two women: one from the Old Testament and one from the New. It was barren Sarah's doing that Hagar was pregnant, but when Hagar lorded it over her mistress, Sara demanded her departure. (See Genesis 16.)

As Hagar sat by a well (fountain) in the wilderness, did wishes march through her mind in drumming despair? Did she wish Abraham loved her? That she had displayed a humble spirit? That Sara had never suggested their arrangement in the first place? In His mercy, God sent an Angel of the Lord (the preincarnate Christ) to Hagar who commanded her to return to Sara and comforted her with news that she would have a son whose seed would become a great multitude. In gratitude, Hagar named this well Beer-lahai-roi -- "a well of the Living One who sees me" (Genesis 16:14).

Returning must have been difficult, and perhaps it was not what Hagar wished, but surely the Lord's presence quenched her misery, and His promise made the circumstances bearable.

Over two thousand years later, Jesus met a Samaritan woman by a well. (See John 4.) She, too, was an outcast, perhaps wishing for acceptance and respectability, for a way to escape her promiscuity. By visiting the well at mid-day, she avoided respectable women who gathered water in the cool of morning or evening.

So, imagine her surprise when a Jewish man not only asked her for a drink (Jews considered Samaritans as unclean.) but also identified the reason she was shunned and then offered her a drink of the Living Water. The Water that cleanses, refreshes, renews; a water that would reside in her as a "well. . . springing up into everlasting life" (John 4:14).

What are your wishes today? Peace of mind? Reconciliation? A second chance? Healing? Whatever wish resides in your heart, turn to the Living One Who Sees, the Living Water. He is not a Disneyland magican who makes all your dreams come true, but He promises to never leave nor forsake you, to see you through every trial, to shield you from every temptation, to bring you safely home into His arms for all eternity.

Isn't that worth wishing for?

Monday, October 12, 2009

The Church's Place in Public School Education

Yesterday my book club had a lively discussion about Outliers: Stories of Success by Maxwell Gladwell, which included the question: Just how much should a public school system supply in the place of negligent parents?

On another note, I also lamented that Gladwell ignored how the spiritual aspect of a person's life might affect his/her personal story.

Both of these points led me to look up some information about a program I learned of a few years ago:

The National Church Adopt-A-School Initiative (NCAASI) began with Oak Cliff Bible Fellowship Church in Dallas, led by Pastor Tony Evans. Evans grew up in urban Baltimore and faced the inherent challenges of that environment. He says: "Government has spent trillions of dollars to reverse and elevate this spiral of social disintegration, yet the problems and pain grow worse with each passing day. I believe the reason for this is the separation of the spiritual from the social. There is a horrific disconnect between the role of the church on Sunday and the condition of hurting people on Monday. This changed in my own life and family when my father discovered the life-giving power of faith and began operating differently because of it. Our home became different from most of the other homes in my neighborhood because the connection had been made between the spiritual and the social." (The Vision of Dr. Tony Evans)

This church networks with the Dallas public school system and suburban community churches to create an extensive ministry out-reach to the urban families in Dallas. Also, it offers training to other churches/school districts/communities to replicate their success across the country. Their purpose is to come alongside the students and their families "by seeking holistic, long-term solutions of meeting needs in a way that changes how people think, which ultimately determines how they live." The philosophy is "not a hand out, but a hand up." (Kingdom Agenda)

They provide
  • Mentoring
  • Tutoring
  • Life Skills and Character Education
  • Sports and Recreation
  • Family Support Services such as food, shelter and clothing; adult education; career development; job placement assistance; and preventive medical checks.

Making school days/year longer will not make lasting changes in the lives of students. Yes, it will give teachers more time to mentor and influence young people, as one club member so eloquently stated from his own experiences. (I can not underestimate the power of one individual to reach another -- many teachers influenced my life for the better.)

But, to me, only adding more time to the day/year, only providing breakfast, only doing whatever we can think of to do because the parents are not doing it, is a "hand out, not a hand up." I do not mean, educators all need to be Christians who evangelize and proselytize their students. I do mean that the best way to change students' lives is to address the "whole" person, and the whole community needs to be involved, and that includes the church/synagogue/mosque/temple.

Visit this video link to learn more about NCAASI .


Sunday, August 9, 2009

Morning Like This

On cool spring mornings when the sun parts the dark sky, waving pink scarves over the horizon, and the dew beads on the grass as sparkling diamonds, I think of the lyrics to "Morning Like This" as Mary Magdalene discovered the empty tomb. How jubilant the creation must have been because the Creator had risen!

Did the grass sing?
Did the earth rejoice
To feel you again?...
Over and over like a Trumpet underground,
Did the earth seem to pound: “He is risen.”
Over and over in a never ending round
“He is risen, alleluia, alleluia!”