Recently a college friend whom I see only occasionally told me that I looked young, beautiful and happy!
Now, it was nice to be regarded as young and beautiful, especially when the reflection in the mirror reveals a sixty-year-old face with lines around the mouth, a slackness in the jaw, and dark circles under the eyes. The image is definitely not air-brushed!
But when I heard the word HAPPY, my heart leaped because that is a transformational gift from God! Through biblically based counseling at Living Foundation Ministries, God renewed my mind (Romans 12:2) and healed my broken heart (Isaiah 61:1) as He unraveled the tangled threads of depression and perfectionistic thinking embedded so deeply within me. Recovery demanded a lot of tears and a lot of prayers, but over time, I began to notice a deep joy bubbling within.
What joy
to be free of false guilt
to be free of unhealthy shame
to walk in the grace of God
to laugh at myself
to be authentic
to enjoy people with all their quirks and foibles
to love them with abandon
to experience God's faithfulness and redemption
Life is not perfect; I am not perfect! When pounded by busyness, grief, or fatigue, this spring seems to slow to a trickle. But, in truth, life's stresses and burdens will never squelch this bubbling joy, for it is the Living Water (John 7:38) Jesus Christ who said, "Whoever drinks of the water that I shall give him shall never thirst, but the water . . . shall be in him a well of water springing up into everlasting life." (John 4:14).
He is the same yesterday, today, and forever. (Hebrews 13:8)
1 comment:
OH, Kathy! I just now got a chance to read your blog and you can't know how my own heart leaped for joy!!! I am certainly not a perfectionist by any means and I don't think I am much of a "controller" either, but when those tendencies do raise their ugly head, I always lose ground spiritually. To be able to relax in God's love and mercy---God's immeasurable, unlimited love and acceptance, is one of the great joys of an intimate realtionship with Jesus Christ! To know that He is God and we are not----nor do we need to be----opens us to "be with people" in such a radically hospitable way that is so fulfilling----I'm not always there, but I am much better than I used to be.
You might really enjoy some of Henri Nouwen's books---"The Beloved" (or "you are the beloved)---book is at my office at the church---would be a great place to start. Anyway, "beautiful and happy"----that's a great combination!!! Thanks for your friendship! "You go, girl"!!!
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